tantra meyotra

Tantra as a sexual education technique for adolescents.

Sex and the humans who aren’t allowed to reproduce.

Sex and adolescents, this combination is the most natural pairing in nature but the most distorted picture in the minds of many. It is absolutely amazing how much fuss we modern people can make of something that is essentially so simple. 

Let’s look at how the concept of sex amongst adolescents is dealt with in scientific studies. By reading these studies it is almost as if we humans have a terrible disease that needs to be addressed before it terminates our existence on earth.

Should we carry on in making sex amongst adolescents a mind based and unnatural issue, then surely we will face extinction, not only in human numbers but also in human values.

Sex education for adolescents.

Sexual education is seen as a solution to a variety of adolescent sexual problems. Teen-age pregnancy is seen as the most unfortunate event in the lives of young human beings. In spite of all the information made available through education, still does it not change the behaviour of adolescents. The concept of birth control is so foreign to human nature, no wonder education is unable to change behaviour.

Education is unable to modify behaviour when that behaviour relates to natural instinct. What it does do is to force feed young people about the superiority of mind-based decision making, instead of instinct-based decision making. These two parallel concepts are not even discussed with adolescents and above all, adolescents are not given a choice in the matter.

Sexuality is demoted to something that needs to be discussed with a medical professional, within a medical clinic situation and contraception is seen as the magic potion that solves all problems. Especially parents are happy with this solution but little do they know what awaits their children in the not too distant future.

Sexual counselling for adolescents.

Adolescents are being made subject to sexual counselling. Once again, this is done by a physician, once again hinting that sexuality and or the person is sick. Young people become patients as if they suffer from a disease called sexuality and according to me, the real sickness is the manner in which we treat sexuality and not the sexuality. If we make sex the problem then the body associated with that sexuality, then the embodiment of that sexuality is inevitably drawn into the same category.

It is reasoned that young people have sexual problems of unwanted pregnancies, of strained relationships and of neglecting their studies if they do become sexually active. Young people are counselled into believing that sex is unnatural, that one should take care and that they should place a lid on what is naturally part of themselves. Sexuality is projected as something that is placed in the waiting room of life and may be forgotten there until it is distinctly distorted.

Society makes pregnancy unwanted, young people are brainwashed to believe it and to behave accordingly. The option to procreate or not, should be left to the individual and should not be decided by society. Society has a responsibility to make available measures and structures to support young people who do opt to reproduce naturally when nature demands a response from them.

The virtues of not having a child.

It appears that there is a tremendous amount of virtue that can be gained through abstaining from reproduction. It reminds me of the swamis and gurus in India who enter a contract with the state to abstain, also the priests in the Roman Catholic Church, also the monks in Buddhist monasteries. It appears that sexuality needs to be feared, to be controlled and to be placed on ice.

The counselling of youngsters regarding the specific areas of masturbation, homosexuality, premarital coitus, contraception and abortion is medical science as it is treated as a medical problem. All these issues stem from not encouraging young people to do what they naturally have to do, to reproduce. I am not in favour of all young people having babies, I’m in favour of handing them the option to reproduce or not.

Should they have a child at a young age then it opens the door to a specific set of problems that have to be faced. Should they opt not to reproduce then they face an equal in weight, set of problems to be faced. In the end the body demands from the owner to flow with the life force that is present in the lives of all people and if it doesn’t happen then it will take revenge at a later stage.

Coaching the minds of adolescents about sexuality.

It appears that adolescents are being coached into a specific way and direction of thinking that is aimed at their decision-making regarding sexuality. Constructive and relevant decision making is a by-product of a series of real-life experiences and not a cognitive or learned way of thinking and decision making.

The conscious or unconscious evaluation of aspects of behaviour, like; autonomic, instinctive, bio sensory, intellectual, philosophical, moral, religious and intuitional awareness, all these need to be looked at. If the aim is to implant or impose an unnatural way of living, to instil an absurd and life foreign concept like ‘preventing unplanned pregnancy” then we should carry on with the existing practices as they do create empty shells robbed from their life force.

In reality, nothing in life can be planned and ultimately everything tends to happen unplanned. To tell young people that they can plan their lives is beyond any responsible approach to life. Life in its very essence just happens through people. To wait to have sex, to wait to get pregnant, to study instead of having a family, all this can be lived in conjunction with reaching pre-set goals. Is it to ensure a better life? If so then we should spell it out and measure our past performances in that regard.

The medical profession and the general adult public are becoming more aware of the need for adolescent contraception in the light of the so called “devastating consequences” of having teenage parents. The devastation is caused by adults and not by sexuality or adolescents and an explanation of why one should take a detour of your natural instinctual human procreation life, is not provided.

Sexual maturation in adolescents.

Adolescent sexuality is too often equalled to teenage pregnancy. This happens only when teenagers are trapped in a belief that there is nothing natural about their sexuality, that it’s something that one should be fearful of as sex equals pregnancy. The concept of sex stays ill-defined as adults have no idea about what sex really is. For most adults it is an emotional itch that should be rubbed, mostly penis and vagina rubbing and that low interpretation of sex is conveyed to the teenagers.

Adults believe that a child’s body undergoes complex changes necessary for adult function as the sex drive is awakened, first at age three and then again around age thirteen. It isn’t clear if a teenager is labelled as a not-yet-adult on economic or biological grounds. It seems that teenagers have to face the task of developing a sexual identity and personal values about sexual behaviour but, according adults, that only happens when the teenager is economically stable.

Medical hazards of teenage pregnancy.

It appears that there is an overall increase in the following incidences amongst teenage pregnancies:

·       infant mortality,

·       growth retarded infants,

·       maternal mortality,

·       and pregnancies terminated by abortion.

It begs for further research to determine whether this increase is because of the biological non-readiness of the young body or does it appear because of the stress of having to handle the destruction of mind-based reality due to a social curse.

Available contraceptive methods:

·       abstinence,

·       sex without intercourse,

·       natural family planning,

·       withdrawal,

·       condoms,

·       vaginal spermicidal agents,

·       diaphragm,

·       IUDs,

·       the pill,

·       abortion.

Physician have two concerns associated with the use of these exogenous steroids in teenage patients:

·       premature closure of the epiphyses,

·       hypothalamic-pituitary dysfunction.

These are medical terms that try to deal with a problem that was caused by adults in the lives of teenagers. The fact that a young people are told that they should rely on mind-based decision making, more than instinct based decision making, that is the origin of the problem and not being a teenager or having sexuality.

Increase in adolescent pregnancy: blessing or curse?

Adolescents who report having sexual intercourse has increased steadily. Youths seen at family planning clinics have mentioned being afraid of their parents finding out about their visit, fear of pelvic exams and fear of health consequences from the pill as reasons for their delay. This is no wonder as teenage sexuality has been demonised, the natural instinct anchoring has been eroded and been replaced by mind based, logical decision making.

Sexual intercourse without contraception has increased. Adolescent pregnancies have increased and abortions have increased. The biggest increase of all sexuality related issues amongst the youth is their rejection of reasons why they should wait, why they can’t have a family and why they should trust adults who do not have their own sexual act together. The behavioural change is towards natural instinct and not towards mind-based education.

Teenage pregnancy and childbearing come at great social and public economic costs but it is fraction of the cost of depression, addiction, suicide and overweight problems caused by making young people strangers to their own natural human instinct.

Adolescent pregnancy, births and elective abortions in the USA, Canada, France, the Netherlands, Great Britain and Sweden are seen as problems, are seen as failures and are seen as a threat. It is sad to observe that the aim is to eradicate teenage pregnancies rather than changing society to accommodate what is natural to its existence.

The West is in decline as the birth-rate does not even reach replacement levels. What do we plan for? What is the future we try to construct? Do we really know better than billion-year-old instinct?

Teen pregnancy in small scale communities of the Northern and Southern hemispheres.

It appears that the number of pregnancies per number of Inuit women, aged between fifteen and nineteen years has increased since the turn of the millennium. Sexual practices of male adolescents in Southern Africa commenced at about twelve years of age. It is believed that girls should prove their fertility before marriage and view contraception as a joint responsibility between the two of them.  

In both cases, the studies revealed that parents did not discuss teenage pregnancy and contraception with their children, instead this subject was discussed among peers at school. Teenagers even expressed fear that their parents would scold them if they initiated the subject of sex and related matters, as sexual practices have to follow clear communal guidelines.

None of these studies entered the realm of traditional societies where education was absent and cultural norms were the guiding principles. In all these societies, the tribe takes responsibility to act as a safety net for all children that were born.

Environmental factors predicting adolescent contraceptive use.

There is public concern that intervention programs for enhancing adolescent contraceptive use might also stimulate sexual activity amongst you youth. Data shows that there is no correlation and the important aspect is that young people should not only be guided into the use of contraceptives but more importantly, they should be coached into understanding the difference between consciousness and awareness regarding sexuality.

Teenagers are screened regarding:

·       their social permissiveness,

·       how they value contraception,

·       if they regard contraception as a benefit,

·       openness to parent communication,

·       the view of the partner regarding contraceptives,

·       their level of sex education and derived knowledge,

·       their attitudes about pregnancy and contraception,

·       and their access to contraception services.

It does not come as a surprise but the most outstanding finding is that positive, open and early parent communication about sexuality is a strong predictor of the regular use of contraceptives. When parents share the importance of teenagers having an instinctual as well as a rational responsibility towards their sexuality, then female adolescents may accept their sexuality and design a lifestyle that suits the specific time of their lives.

Personal conflicts and ambivalence in the hearts of young people, conflict about the purpose of reproductive instinct and rational mind-based societal norms, need more investigation. Adolescents no longer take what they are told on face value. Young people know that they have been misled in the past about the benefits of having to wait, about the denial of the reality of procreative instinct and the inability of society to assimilate the changing lives of the young members of that society.

Psychosocial factors influencing teenage sexual activity.

To question the meaning of life is the fundamental principle on which psychology builds its place within the sciences. To develop an understanding of factors that are prompting unplanned pregnancy during adolescence, one has to include the instinctual and societal realities of procreation.

Psychology has to probe the driving forces behind reproduction as was done by Sigmund Freud. To go into denial about the presence or relevance of human instinct has never served the individual or the society. That denial has brought more harm to a society than teenage unplanned pregnancies.

To examine the influence of teenagers’ perceptions of family relationships and future life prospects is of paramount importance. Once contraception is no longer promoted as a societal cure for an instinctual problem, only then we will be able to make steps in the right direction. Unplanned pregnancy isn’t acceptable and planned pregnancy isn’t viable, we have to accept that fact and start looking for new answers to real questions.

Teenagers who were living with both natural parents, who were in school, who received sexual information from the internet rather than parents and who discussed sexual values with friends, this group were more stable in overriding their natural human instinct with mental mindsets. The adolescents who were involved in longer relationships with their boyfriends, who were cohabiting with their boyfriends, unemployed and out of school, this group was more prone to follow their natural human instinct and participate in reproduction of an offspring.

Relative consequences and moral absolutes in sexual consciousness.

When a society comes up with a moral absolute strategy for preventing premarital sexual intercourse among adolescents, then it is a clear sign about how empty it is in natural instinctual values and how rich it is in mind-based belief systems. When teenagers are given rules instead of options then society becomes an enemy instead of a caretaker.

Perceived premarital sexual permissiveness, when based on the opinion of parents, of friends, of religious leaders and ultimately on the voices of sex guilt, then marriage should be reconsidered and not sex. Marriages fail all the time and still we expect young people to follow the first study, first career, first wait to have sex strategy. Many Arabian cultures have incorporated a loose structure of marriage to give young people the opportunity to have sexual experiences as nature intended.

The relative consequences strategy, which highlights the prevention of pregnancy among unmarried sexually active youngsters, is represented by contraception education and the availability thereof. It is unfortunate that the aim remains to be the prevention of adolescent premarital pregnancy even though pregnancy is the most natural aspect of being alive, especially when nature calls for it.

Parenting Influences on Adolescent Sexual Activities.

Productive parent-child relationships reduce sexual thrill-seeking among adolescents as these youngsters have learned through first hand observation that sexuality isn’t an emotional bonding device but follows a billion-year-old protocol aimed at reproduction.

Sexual initiation of youngsters can be a celebration of the family or it can be experienced in isolation. The choice of sexual partners can also be influenced when the teenager understands that sexuality is not only between individuals but also between the individual and its own instinct to reproduce.

The better choices sexuality project.

When school-based sexual health programs present unique proposals, which are always based on handing opportunities rather than instruction, only then can there can be hope to alter sexual behavioural patterns amongst people who find themselves the prime of their reproduction discoveries.

Young people should be initiated into the ovulation cycle of the female body as it follows four distinctive stages and each stage solicits a unique response from the male body.

On menstruation there is an ever-present contradiction of happiness and sadness about not being pregnant. If the male person defaults to happiness when the female person didn’t conceive, then things start to become unnatural.

From menstruation to ovulation the female body is geared towards evaluating possible suitors to ensure pregnancy as the ovulation days are only twelve days away. If males can grasp that the female person will indulge in rigid scrutinising techniques, then the males can stop talking about how girls change all the time but start to enjoy the natural game that unfolds due to hormonal change.

On ovulation the female body demands that she is taken. This doesn’t mean violently, neither does it imply sex. The female body wants to experience activities, even role play of being taken for her reproductive ability. This can be the highlight of status pegging amongst the boys and the winner has the opportunity to flow with his own beautiful natural human instinct to capture the presence of a female person.

From ovulation to the next menstruation the female body is acutely focussed on gathering care givers by her side as there might be no menstruation forthcoming as conception could have taken place. If the male youngsters can learn appropriate responses to what they find in the behaviour of female youngsters around them, then we have reached a place of better choices for males, females, families and community.

Comprehensive school-based health clinics: to improve adolescent health or to reduce teen-age pregnancy?

The duality in human nature can’t be better explained than by looking at comprehensive health centres in schools that provide family planning and other services related to sexuality and are commonly operated by medical providers and are staffed by nurses and physicians.

These medical centres at schools represent the current view on life, that is about the prevention of teenage pregnancies and confirms the idea in the minds of young people that sexuality is a sickness that they should receive medical treatment.

The next step in an evolutionary process in improving adolescent health should be counselling about sexual activity as a viable option and something that comes with the blessing and support of the community. Should clinics continue to be called clinics and label healthy young people as patients, then the progress will be slow or not at all. Should centres pop up, even created by young people themselves and deal with the natural instinct to reproduce in an open and clear way, then the rewards will be great.

The concept of turning healthy youngsters into medical patients, all this is anchored in a mindset about what life “should be”. The concept that youngsters should be handed opportunities to flow with their natural human instinct to procreate, all this is anchored in an awareness about “what is”.

Whenever I discuss these concepts with adults then I’m bombarded with criticism that it’s irresponsible to allow young people to have an offspring. My answer is always that I have never said that children should have children but that children should not be told that their natural instinctive decision making is inferior to mind-based decision making.

Adolescents should have opportunities to feel and experience the naturalness of instinctual reproduction even if it is in role play only but role play that is anchored in awareness of natural instinct.

-Martin du Toit